i write this right now, just because anything about you is rushing on my mind. i don't know why, but it's happening, and nothing can't stop this thing.
do you know? i simply remember all the sweet things you ever said to me. and still remember how all these kind of feelings was mine. ever since we've met. i never knew before, that you're going to be the only one i think about when i feel left alone. i just know you as a friend from the same old school, years ago. never assume that you're handsome enough like any other said about you. admire you and become crazy when you're around them. i'm just standing and sitting away all by myself, like i didn't know you. deep down inside i admitted, after all..they were right.
i don't quite understand how it all began. but i won't deny it, that at the first time, i was trying to be close enough with you, to make all of my friend, which is your fans, jealous. hahaha. silly huh? yes it is, but it's true. each day, i went through my life to get to know you better than before. and then i felt something different. such a, like you? yup maybe. but i don't really realize it at first. and those feelings just grew, bigger. even before i could say it, my heart already admitted it. and my mind give me the same answer. i do like you at all.
after that, the only thing i know is, everything leads us to this feeling. the feelings that tell us, that we like each other. this is kinda absurd, but it is the truth. could be said, i never actually spoken to you before. but now you're becoming the only one that i would like to talk to.
but why? why did you do that to me? don't you ever realize that it was the hardest part of all. letting you go without explanation. seeing you gone with the wind, and left me with nothing. yes. you left. and i don't know how i should explain my feelings at that time. but most of all, all that i know is, it just hurts. much. more than you ever imagined. then, the next thing i know, i need to step back. release all the heartache. and smile. let you go and start to live without any reason to hold on to you.
it's never been easy you know, go through days knowing that you will never texted me again after this. it is awkward. but i'm trying so hard to understand. day by day, month by month, and year change. i already move on and erase my feelings for you. but you know what? seeing you again, one more time, all the memories coming through my mind, rushing back through the pain, and all the following flashbacks hurt me again. and make me realize one thing. you know what is that? it is my feelings for you. it was never being removed, and it's all still here. stay in my heart. and i don't even know, what drives me to be closely with you as it once was.
and there we go. we texted to each other like we used to. get to know each other more than before. share stories about everything that gone by. then we do realize, you and i, we still have those old feelings. both of us understand now, you love me, your feelings, it was never gone away far from your heart, and me, i'm still here, waiting for you to come back.♥
sincerely,
me...
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